Sunday, May 10, 2009

The Phantom Oak Catkin Menace

Ms. Bailey here, with a report of a disturbing scourge which has fallen from the sky in post-glacial Connecticut. Catkins! Specifically Oak Catkins! More specifically, the pollen-tassel of Quercus borealis, the Northern Red Oak. No, they are not little kitties, which indeed have a defensible use (chasing, barking at, &c.). Every May, catkins fall from the sky with the singular purpose of fouling the beards of Kerry Blue Terriers!

Observe Ahab here--yes, Ahab--he with the peg-leg, which was his just reward for pursuing cosmic forces he did not understand (Great White Whale, ineffable karmic destiny, or possibly Sawtooth Sephie--whatever pinched his paw, it became abscessed). At any rate, note the sublime befuddlement that registers in his uncomprehending, testosterone-drenched eyes.

Oh, the misery! Plainly divine retribution is afoot (which is what Buster retains the use of in his fore-quarters); some ancient debt must be repaid.

No Kerry, regardless of virtue, has been spared. Even I, paragon of saintliness as I know myself to be, am afflicted with this vile pestilence!

Plainly, we are being tested. Perchance I should perform some penance. Must I wear the Scarlet "K" upon my tunic? Parade around the village square confessing my alternate career as a Conjurer and Witch?

Nah, boring! I'm just going to curl up with my buddy, Monsieur l'Éléphant, and enjoy an afternoon nap.

Your faithful friend,

Ms. Bailey Blue


Sue said...

Our yard is covered with Oak catkins and PWDs catch them in our curls. Tsar carries a supply of them in his tail and Mom thinks they're the cause of her headaches and sneezing.

Faya said...

Pas de chêne ici, quelle chance....mais alors tout est jaune chez nous en ce moment et Véronique éternue beaucoup !
Bisous, Faya & Dyos

Lucia said...

Cats, kitties, catkins, gatti ... they're everywhere!!! It's all highly suspicious.

Busterigo, your poor paw! I hope it's molto, molto, molto better PDQ, dolce ragazzo. (I hear ice cream is a fantastico tonic for a sore foot.........giggle!!!)

Tanti baci!!

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