The Observant Naturalist: Today's Species

Busterigus tongueflappus

Family: Canidae

Genus: Canus

Species: lupus

Subspecies: busterigus

Sub-subspecies: tongueflappus





Range: Within barking distance of Lucia.


Habitat: Typically found on soft, horizontal furnishings--couches, beds, sleeping human torsos, pillows.


Diet: Opportunistic. Eats anything that comes across his plate. Especially fond of Irish stouts and waffles.


Temperament: Quirky; varies from hypomanic to hypomanic. Often irrationally exuberant with intermittent bursts of intense energy.


Markings: Similar to Sephalumpagus distinctis. Ears have positive dihedral for effective glide ratio if dropped from an airplane. Outstretched tongue functions as effective aileron.


Lifespan: Like S. distinctis, generally outlives primates due to tendency to wear them down.


Daily routine: Get up, pee. Lay down, get up, eat. Lay down, get up, eat, pee. Sleep, get up, pee. Play with Wilson non-stop, lay down, drink water, pee.... Repeat 20 times. Receive adoration of human servants and caresses behind ears. Accustomed to harsh environment.

The Observant Naturalist: Today's Species

Sephalumpagus Distinctus

Family: Canidae

Genus: Canus

Species: lupus

Subspecies: sephalumpagus

Sub-subspecies: distinctus





Range: Subarctic New England; does not stray far from companion species Homo sapiens neanderthalensis


Diet: Wisteria leaves and TV remotes


Temperament: Possessed by spirits barely understood by science


Markings: Gun-metal blue coat, punctuated by brown eyes and and large quantities of attitude


Lifespan: Typically outlives most humans due to robust immune system, superior powers of digestion, and propensity to drive primates crazy


Daily routine: Enjoys solving Fermat's Last Theorum and resolving EPR Parodox in quantum mechanics; takes long naps; barks at sky for no apparent reason

Snickers Needs Our Help ----->

hey to every human and every dog... we're passing the word for ms. snickerzzzz she needs our help...our zen.........our energy....to fight this bad cancer! Read on ----------> we're sending much blue zen to her and her family!
the blue dogs, theBUSTER, Ms.Persephone & Ms.Blue too
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the following info. was taken from maggie & mitches blog to pass on to every human and every dog -- please post to your blog----->

So as many dogs and cats and families
as possible can read it prior to 5:00 PM, Saturday, 14 Nov 09, Iowa Time
(11:00 PM, 14 Nov 09 GMT)
.
Just please help us get the message out.

As you may know
Miss Snickers is struggling
Mightily
Along with her family.




(The best place to keep up with updates
is her Gussie’s blog.)
Last night looked as if it might have been her last.
This morning she rebounded with improved symptoms.
She is far from out of the woods
But she and her family
Including her gentle and loving brother Butchy
Have been granted another day.
We can’t help but believe
that part of the improvement is because of
The support and love that have surrounded her
From all around the world
Thanks to the linked paws
Of her blogging friends.
The Power of the Paw
We are asking everyone to set your alarms
And at exactly 11:00 PM GMT on Saturday 14 Nov 09
(Go to this link to find what time that is for you)
5:00 PM Saturday evening in Iowa
as Snickers' family sits down to eat
Turn toward them (in the central USA)
And join together in a silent minute
Of prayer, meditation, contemplation, reflection
Whatever feels right to you.
Followed by whatever means of communication
You choose.
Arrooing
Barking
Howling
Yipping
Yapping
Wooing
Meowing
Mewing
Purring
To wish and send Miss Snickers and her family
whatever is in your hearts
That will help them feel the Love and Support
They need right now.
Personally, we’ll be praying for a Miracle.
Then
Blow a Kiss
and send your Love and Prayers and Best Wishes
to Miss Snickers and her Family
and they will feel their arrival
in the breeze.
OK?
We believe it will help.
And we'll do anything in our power right now
To help.

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My Valiant Vanquishing of the Leaf-Dragon--An Annual Event...by St. Buster the Audacious of Liefmould

"Thus as they spake together the dragon appeared and came running to them, and St. Buster was upon his horse, and drew out his sword and garnished him with the sign of the cross, and rode hardily against the dragon which came towards him, and smote him with his spear and hurt him sore and threw him to the ground. And after said to the maid: Deliver to me your girdle, and bind it about the neck of the dragon and be not afeard. When she had done so the dragon followed her as it had been a meek beast and debonair."


The Legend of St. Buster
Aurea Legenda (The Golden Legend)
Jacobus de Voragine, 1275



"He took his vorpal sword in hand:
Long time the manxome foe he sought"

The Jabberwocky
Lewis Carroll



Dearest friends:

I shall recount this narrative of Ultimate Peril, chivalry, and the triumph of Good over the vile forces of Evil, in the hope that there may be some amusement for the soul in it.

It came to pass, during the dark days of November, that my ancient Nemesis, the Leaf-Dragon, returned to pillage and plunder, striking Terror into the hearts of the peasantry.



Remembering the Prophesy uttered by a wart-nosed Sayer of Sooths during my last visit to Hot Bridgett's Soothsaying Emporium, I mounted my handsome white Percheron charger and set forth on a Quest.



I found the foul-breathed Leaf-Dragon in its lair, using linear programming models on a Cray Supercomputer to plot the Destruction of Medieval Western Civilization. Without hesitation, I attacked!

The vile creature was wounded but not put out of action. It retreated to its den in a remote tribal region of New Haven County, and I encamped upon the rear deck to treat my wounds.




It was time for sterner measures! I implored my human companion, Saint Attila, to give me access to the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch.

And Saint Attila raised the hand grenade up on high, saying,’O Lord, bless this thy hand grenade that with it thou mayest blow thine enemies to tiny bits, in thy mercy.’ And the Lord did grin, and the people did feast upon the lambs and sloths and carp and anchovies and orangutans and breakfast cereals and fruit bats and large chu—

But Saint Attila did toss ye Holy Hand Grenade toward me, and I did retrieve it.

And Saint Attila spake, saying, ‘First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then, shalt thou count to three, no more, no less. Three shalt be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, nor either count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who, being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it.’

Thus did I pull the pin!

It was then that ye Leaf-Dragon made its attack.

At last, I retrieved ye barely-visible, yellow, Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch, in this case the fabled "Stealth Model" that color-blind terriers cannot see, and yea did I cause it to expode and blow the Evil Leaf-Dragon into tiny pieces!

Proud I was--but not one to rest upon my laurels, I immediately engaged St. Attila, my human lackey, in a round of Holy Hand Grenade Practice, so that I would be prepared for the sons and daughters of the Leaf-Dragon when they came to avenge its untimely demise!

Note to St. Buster: I must employ Countermeasures to defeat the Stealth Cloaking Device! This is more challenging than Quidditch.

Maybe I can learn something from my World Cup heroes. Methinks the key is to keep ye Hand Grenade aloft and visible!

Forsooth! I've got it! Observe my technique!

Now the Churlish Knave shalt not escape!

I must now adjourn to my quarters to consult with the Grand Master and take a nap!

Verily,

ye Buster

Gurlzz Gone Wild...in which Persephone & Bailey escape their attendants and spend an autumn afternoon at large without medication

Dearest correspondents:

It was a quite ordinary afternoon. Bailey and I had been released from Ward 8 and allowed to stroll the grounds for awhile in order to throw off the patina of despair that the premature arrival of short days had cast upon us. We were suffering from an acute case of the Vapors!



Free of our attendants, I decided to do the only decent thing: engage Warp Drive and attempt to rip Bailey's ears off.

There is a certain ennui that accumulates after all those group therapy sessions.



I had not been feeling quite myself since Dr. Mom strapped me to the grooming bench and plugged in "old sparky," flooding my frontal lobes with all that electricity...

Time for some exercise! Bailey must die!

Now, that was refreshing! She's over nine years old; maybe she'll get tired...



No...Bailey NEVER gets tired! Damn! That creature has more energy than an exploding supernova!

It's time for my giraffe delusion. This is how I get my attendants to bring me back and give me those nice drugs... Acacia tree!

So long for now,

Persephone, interrupted

A Daring Voyage of Discovery... in which Captain Buster sets out in search of New Latitudes, Botanical Wonders, and Exotic Natives

It was a dark and dreary day with winter approaching in the Northern Latitudes.
Our gargoyle expressed his feelings on the subject of rain.

At the request of the Royal Society, I took command of HM Bark Endeavour and proceeded South in search of breadfruit, naked girls, and paradise.

You know this sounds familiar...have I sailed these waters before? This sailing ship certainly rides rather smooth. Hmmmm

It was an arduous voyage. The passage through the Roaring '40's was fraught with danger. But I maintained my watch on the Quarterdeck and tried to keep the up the spirits of my distraught navigator...

Who worried about the turbulent sea of black water that flowed for miles in front of him. His knuckles were white with fear.... uh...why is that guy ahead of us stopping in the middle of the ocean?

We traveled many thousands of leagues, each day darkened by the imminent onset of a long, cold winter.

As we sailed through the icy winds, water spewed up on the sheets creating a lovely pattern of sparkling ice... Sort of like a giant snowflake...hmmmm now that sounds like one pretty thing to catch on your tongue.

At last, we reached an exotic island and my demeanor improved as I disembarked to explore!

A gust of wind blew my beard to the side as I began to explore the beach of yellow, red, and brown sand......uh, maybe that was leaves, I distinctly remember leaves. Yes yes...it is leaves.

What a strange place this was! There was a sign asserting that dogs must be on leash! Where I come from, dogs run free and possess human servants.


Who are these city code people...Fie, fie on you, I pee on your post...so there!

So this is the fabled Quinnipiac River Gorge. I had learned of this place in school. There were stories of giant airedales and volcanoes that spew forth tennis balls--and long, evening barbecues. Well, at least it appeared pleasing to the eye!


So how do you like that visual??? huh?? Volcanoes spewing forth tennis balls -- I dream of this every night!

There was a long, straight path that descended into the forest. Mustering what courage that I could, I followed it.


Trudge • trudge • trudge....through the yellow, orange and red sand I trudged at least 50 leagues through the colorful sand, hauling my human lackey behind me.

You know...these humans need to be walked every day. Life on the ship just doesn't lend itself to such exercise. This guy is way heavy--maybe I'll tie him to a post and pick him up on the way back.

I've discovered the rare red, uh bush in the brush. I will now bestow upon thee a name.

With the Power of the Blue Dog of Ireland, I now dub thee with the name that will go down in history..........it is............

"Rare Red Bush"

AHaH, natives...these are the infamous New Englanders. Notice the blue legs and skirt. I must get closer to document this for my colleagues at the Royal Society.

Avast! 'Tis the horrid Zone of Falling Rocks! Scylla and Charybdis are a cake-walk compared with this! Serendipitously, the ancient pagan gods conferred upon us Kerry Blues nerves of steel. These were granted at the expense of some gray matter, but curiosity is a wondrous thing.

I must conduct my standard urinal-fitness inspection!

Aha! A river flowing into the Interior! Maybe I'll meet happy, scantily-clad natives in dugout canoes!




Or maybe I'll have to be content with seventeen metric tons of maple leaves floating downstream.

There! The Pillars of Hercules! Or maybe the Horns of Satan! Anyone who says this is an old bridge foundation lacks imagination.

I am unscathed.

Well, suppose I survived the wrath of the Horns of the Evil one!

I am not toast!

Onward!

What's with these mile markers? I've trudged at least 25 leagues now--can't they keep accurate records? We explorers just don't comprehend this mile thing ...it's "Leagues!" As in 20,000 Leagues Under the Compost Heap.

Just how long is a league?

Well now, we're back to the ship, getting ready to sail with the tide. My tongue is at least a yard long, and I could use some rum to wet my whistle. Lackey! Where is my cask?

I want my rum ration NOW! After all, I am the Captain of this ship.... Can't you see that my tongue is going to fall out of my head?

I feel better now -- I must now take a small nap...

Hey Hey.. we're back home. Oh my, the larch looks a little droopy, I think I should water it before it loses all its leaves.



There's no place like home. Even Mr. Larch is all disheveled and looking sort of like he needs a haircut--like me. That will be another day, another adventure.

Signing off,

theBUSTER

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"This ecstasy doth unperplex" -- in which Buster receives a fresh supply of his cherished Wilsons.

A Book of Verses underneath the Bough,
A Jug of Wine, a Loaf of Bread--and Wilson
Beside me singing in the Wilderness--
Oh, Wilson were Paradise enow!

The Rubaiyat of Buster Khayyam

Where to begin?



Few things in life evoke unrestrained ecstasy. Among them: raw beef bones, the Bach partitas for unaccompanied violin, and shiny, new Wilsons!



Thus it was ordained--that I, Buster, the altogether likable and deserving, should receive from my Mom a fresh supply of brand new, not previously-owned, Wilsons.



It had been so long since my cache of yellow gold had been replenished, and most of my very favorites had turned brown from leaf-mold and the accumulated rain of a torrential summer.



So Phase I of the Official Distribution of Wilsons began in the usual way:

It was my misfortune to have to compete with that aggressive little wolf-child, Bailey, for MY Wilsons! She torments me as the Great White Whale did Ahab.



It's all in the nose, you know. Like the smell of a new car! Rather rubbery and synthetic, but reassuring in an odd way. Wilsons have a distinctive scent that, like wine, is improved with a certain amount of aging and saliva!



Round Two: The Evil B_t_h Bailey goes into Wilson-Diva mode while I relegate myself to a remote corner with my precious orb, muttering something like "oh, my precious, oh my precious!" My human sister's flute in the background didn't help; it affects Bailey in the same way that it would a cobra in a basket.

What's a dapper boy-dog to do? She's stealing my show, raining on my parade, masticating my Wilsons!




The final insult: she covetously takes possession of ALL THREE and juggles them like a Cirque du Soleil clown, demonstrating an innate virtuosity of which I am not capable.



HUMILIATION !

Two Wilsons in her paws, one in her mouth. There is ecstasy here, but it's hers, not mine! I'll chase the little devil round Good Hope, and round the Horn, and round the Norway Maelstrom, and round perdition's flames before I give my Wilsons up! Oops--wrong story, wrong century.




And as the sun sets, I, a chastened and humiliated Wonder Dawg, plot my revenge upon Bailey the Über-thief!

Then again, I'll bet Mom has another stash of new Wilsons somewhere around! I'm just a little emotional these days. Where's Lucia?



G'night,


Buster

My Milkweed Collection--by Buster

Hi folks, I'd like to share my poofee-fuzzy friends with you.... I saw some parachuting along -- so I followed them.
These very strange pods hold millions of beeeeeUteefull delicate parachutes, that carry little bitty seeds on the breeze. Of course sooner or later they need to land -- and sometimes they land
on YOU!

I just think the way they are all lined up in their pod, is very nice.. warm....white fuzzeeez!


I've got to be careful they don't land on my tongue.. oh NO not my TONGUE~ !

Check this one out.. the little fluoofs are taking off from the mother pod, getting ready to float on the wind to a new spot....that needs milkweed pods.
HmmmmMMMMmmm wonder if they taste good. Might get to try one if I leave my tongue lollllling out a bit more.


Loooookie that.. they're all lined up just like the parachuters in the movies.. We're goin' down!
They're fluffy not stuffy, if one flies this way...............welllllllll.....My tongue wants to check these floooofs out realllllly badly.


Hey.. thanks for checking these little fella's out.. psssssssst I took one in the house and it PoPPed open -- does that mean I'll have a whole bunch of little baby milkweek podlings growing in the yard? I must check it out!


You know these things are going to be all over the placed, Ms.Blue wants to make a
scarf out of them so she can be fluffy like them. Maybe she'll be able to fly!!!

See how very soft and translucent these little podlings are. They need good homes, we'll try and catch you a really neat one..

Oops... this is a very strange looking one.. no pod. Hmmmm looks like something from the ocean.



Not milkweed! This is the seed pod of a wild clematis vine.


I am now a connoisseur of PODS....w/flooofy flying friends... HAH! Here's another of my flooofy flying friends..



Mallard reflecting upon the reflections..... ah welll I'm a bit tired.

I must sleep now, goodnight floofs......g'night all,


Happy dreams,

theBUSTER, Ms. Persephone, & Ms.Bailey Blue

First Frost

It's here. It's real. It's cold.



Makes ya want to eat raw meat and howl!


I LOVE Autumn! Lots of new scents in the air...little animals foraging...stuff keeling over dead everywhere. Makes a dog feel alive!



Milkweed pods! One of my very favorite things. Crunchy, messy, and good for the gums!



Frost on my Wilson! There's nothing like the taste of a cold, wet Wilson. And it splits in two much easier.



Frosted hosta--what a wonderful place to lift my leg!




And formations of Canadian Honkers carpet-bombing unsuspecting humans from a thousand feet up! It stimulates the imagination.



Miss Persephone shuffles about unamused.



Sumac! Nothing gets redder, except for Mom when she catches me grabbing a loaf of fresh bread off the stove!



Ms. Blue quietly rips the flesh off a coatimundi. She has talent.





A sugar maple blushes in front of the art school...



Ms. B. settles in for an autumnal power-nap...



Bittersweet berries turn bright orange and red, cracking with the frost.




And I, Buster the Wonder Dog, contemplate the wonders of Nature and my general good fortune to be a part of it. Last night, the Dad-Lackey took me for a walk, and I quickly detected the scent of VERMIN! With a single-minded intensity, I tracked the vile creature, never lifting my eyes from the ground. It was my destiny to find it, destroy it, and save Western Civilization! Unfortunately, my human servant caught sight of something galloping toward us but failed to warn me. He watched as Ms. Fox sat down fifteen feet away from my snuffling snout, cocked her head to one side, and observed me with detached curiosity. At length, she cocked her head to the other side, nodded sadly, and trotted off. I heard this second-hand, as I was busy tracking a fox. Dad said she was one hot young lady with a beautiful, bushy tail, and she was trying to flirt with me. I'll never know.

Ah, autumn!

G'night,

Buster

Season's End: Farewell to the Pond

Welllllll it's that time again... autumn in New England -- one last burst of colorful turbo energy flying around the pond. Every year about this time the humomm and dad go around and put everything away so the pond can take a rest for the winter. The boats come out of the water ------>

We don't quite understand why...we just know that it's too cold to swim and the pipes need to not have water in them.
and the dock needs to come out of the water too and take a nap until spring.
Oh yes and let's not forget the trees -- they get all warm and colorful -- and lose their leaves.

all over the flower gardens. The humomm says it's a colorful quilt of leaves, so the flowers can snooze until spring. We'll be back to see them.....bye lake, bye flowers....bye paddle boat.
Heavy sigh..........

zZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

On our way home we stopped at a farm stand and the humomm was all excited to see that they had swan gourds..... very strange gourds that have longy necks and a head like a swan. Of course they also had pumpkins (my favorite pie) so we got to pick some and bring them to our house.

We just thought everyone would like to see all the swan gourds tackling the pumpkins!

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OH NO.... I've gotta get home and find all of my Wilsons. I don't want the leaves to cover them all up -- I need to find them before the snows come -- they'll be soooooo very cold. More to come on the search......and also more on where are all the Wilsons.

∆∆∆∆∆

So HAPPY AUTUMN/FALL to all our buddies. If you don't have orange and red trees at your house take a ride up to the mountains. This will be one very colorful weekend up this way.

Enjoy,
theBUSTER, reporting to you from the North Country..... soon to be under snow!

P.S. this little May flower is sooooo confused!! Check out the red leaf sitting next to it. I told it bye bye....see you in the spring!

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