Saturday, February 16, 2008

The LAND of LOST TOYS, Part I....by theBUSTER

HELLO to my public... my humomm has returned from the land of sun and sand and has agreed to post a small selection of my "COLLECTION OF DEAD TOYS" that have not already gone to "theLAND of LOST TOYS".

There was a short preview in the previous post, of me de-stuffing a little animal-- HAH! That was just a small example of my expertise (no little animals were harmed in the making of this post). I am a professional after all...

DOCTOR theBUSTER here...at your service.







Up close and
PERSONAL-LIKE...
I reallllllly check the toys out
thoroughly, to be sure...
there isn't something in there --
that just isn't quite right....




Take, for instance, this ball...

Seems like an ordinary ball to most folks-- but to me, the Kerry with the X-Ray vision, it seemed to need extra attention...

I decided to dissect the little bugger...



OBSERVATION # 1... it is NOT a WILSON... notice the red outer covering! It peals off like an orange. Wilsons do not do this...have never done this and will not do this...ever!

OBSERVATION # 2... take note of how cheaply it is made! I mean, it broke in half with one little bit of pressure from my amply-endowed, lupine jaws. Pffft!!

OBSERVATION # 3... there is no yoke inside! C'mon, what is wrong with these manufacturers????





MOVING RIGHT ALONG... I hold in my delicate paws... a saxophone! Does it play?

NOPE!

Does it have a small hole chewed in it?

YUP!


Did I, theBUSTER, make this hole.. ? Uh.....wellllllll.... actually, I hadn't seen the sax for so long, I was just sooooo excited to see it again, and I accidentally made an exploratory incision near the bell: to check out where the music was supposed to come from...

Darn! The little thingy attached to the other thingy is broke... uh.....I think my tooth must have gone through it.

I wish I had something other than my big white teeth to dissect these toys with...

This is just very hard work.




AHA! PAY DIRT!

Do you see it?? it's a "THINGY," right there next
to my saxophone...it was hidden in amongst
all the fluff! I got it out to show everyone!

THERE ARE STRANGE, HIDDEN OBJECTS IN MY TOYS! It is my solemn duty to find them and remove them before they have a chance to harm our humans!!


So anyway, that's just ONE strange & unusual "THINGY." There are more out there, lurking inside of innocent-looking toys!

Unfortunately, my saxophone isn't "playing" jazz any more. I wonder if the "THINGY" had something to do with it? Gotta give this some deep thought...



Oh, I LOVE my work!

This is DOCTOR theBUSTER signing off for now.

I have many more toys to dissect and not much time to do it--especially if I'm on the 'puter...

I'll be back with more explicit pictures of the TOY dissection monologues later, after I pick up the mess......

Oh.. and I will also address "theLAND of LOST TOYS" (did'ja ever wonder where stuff goes after it's been dissected, chewed up, and shredded?) in a subsequent post!

theBUSTER

7 comments:

Faya said...

Buster you are the best ! I love your job....realy the best of the best.... Tu es notre maître à tous !
Kisses, Faya

Molly the Airedale said...

Excellent work, Buster! Do you think that there was a chick inside that ball and you missed him as he skipped off to find cover? We just can't believe the ball is empty inside!

Love ya lots,
Maggie and Mitch

Noah the Airedale said...

Hello Buster, it's Tess here. You are just so talented and clever. We never knew that about Wilson balls. I guess our pinkies always buy the el cheapo variety cause they don't last long with Lucy around either. She peels them like an orange too.

Hugs and kisses
Tess

Cassidy said...

You be my hero! Me no has managed to do this to any toys yet, but now that nme has all but 3 off my big teethies, me thinks is only a matter of time, especially if you tutor me!

Nibbles
Cassidy x

Buster the Wired Fox Terror said...

The skins get reused for carpeting and upholstery, and the stuffins go to Santa.

Bussie Kissies
Buster

Princess Patches said...

Buster, you are the master of destructomania! Can we come over for lessons? We still have a FEW toys that we haven't done surgery on, YET! Not many, though!

Aire-hugs,
Poppy & Penny

Urban Smoothie Read said...

buster, u are a really skillful surgeon...

salute...