Monday, December 31, 2007

Progress Report: Beards

There was an old man with a beard, who said: 'It is just as I feared! Two owls and a hen, four larks and a wren have all built their nests in my beard.
Edward Lear

First, a brief historical note!


The longest beard ever measured belonged to Hans Langseth of Norway. When he died, in 1927, it was 5.33 metres (17 feet 6 inches) long. The longest beard belonging to a woman was attached to the chin of one Vivian Wheeler of Wood River, Illinois. It grew to 27.9 centimetres (11 inches).
Some Noteworthy Beards:


Herman Melville
Wrote Moby Dick and lived with cannibals



The Smith Brothers
Nursed nine generations of hypochondriacs back to health


Walt Whitman
Sang about himself


Gen. James "Old Pete" Longstreet
Corps Commander, Army of Northern Virginia
Almost won the American Civil War for the Confederacy until he sent Pickett charging into a wall of Union artillery at Gettysburg.

The above, unsolicited, history of les Éminences Grises has been brought to you by the huDAD. Of course, to appreciate REAL beards, one must enter the domain of canines: Airedales, Bouviers des Flandres, and of course, Kerry Blues!


EXHIBIT A



We present, for your consideration,
Persephone, the Dark Goddess of the Underworld.

Beard Length: 5 1/2 inches



Addendum for the Record:

These trimmings were already removed from the none-too-willing chin of Persephone prior to measurement. Her beard actually exceeded that of both His Lordship Bozo the WonderDog and Bailey the ArchDiva Ruler of the Universe in length. That is, until her huMOMM chopped it in October prior to a show!


EXHIBIT B



Bailey, the ÜberMom of Persephone & Buster

Beard Length: 5 1/2 inches


EXHIBIT C



Buster, the Scourge of Small Rodents

Beard Length: 5 3/4 inches

So that's it... the measuring of the Kerry beards has been completed, and now you know the long and short of it...

We can't wait to see how all our bearded buddies do!

Mom says it's time to shave...



Sephie, Buster, & Bailey



7 comments:

Molly and Taffy said...

Those are impressibe beard lengths. I feel I would require at least another 6 months to equal those!

Molly

Maggie & Mitch said...

I don't think I stand a chance! I'll have mom get the yardstick out just to check! Thanks for the reminder, guys!

Love ya lots,
Maggie

Noah the Airedale said...

Wow, thanks for the beard lesson. That poor woman who had a beard. How unfortunate!!!!!!!!

If you guys are in Stanley's Beard growing comp, we think you've won hands down. They are most impressive beards.

Hugs and tail wags
Noah Willow Tess & Lucy

Ume said...

HAPPEE NEW YEAR, GUYS!!!
those r some impressive beards on some very gorgeous Kerry Blues!
tho i dun understand y did dat lady hooman grow her beard...

Harry said...

I am in awe of your beards. Mine just seems to get bushier, not longer.

Happy new year to you all!

Toodle pip,
Harry x

Jackson said...

Wow, your beards are PAWSOME. I only managed to get to 3 inches! J x

Stanley said...

You pups are almost in a 3-way tie for longest beard. I'll be posting sometime Saturday or Sunday! (Too bad you couldn't have measured before trimming yourself for the show, Sephie!)

Goober love & smooches,
Stanley